Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Stimulus: $900,000 Drug Haven

As it turns out, cities are now holding their hands open under the new Federal Vending Machine waiting to see if they can push the right buttons and get a prize.

Here is a short list of some of the more ridiculous projects local governments are asking you to pay for.

Shreveport wants $6 million to build 3 new water parks complete with slides!

Chula Vista, CA has requested $500,000 for a dog park.

Lincoln, NE is looking for $3 million for an environmentally friendly clubhouse for the municipal golf course.

Las Vegas needs $2 million for, of course, more neon lights! I doubt anyone will be able to tell if they get it though.

But the real kicker to me is that Austin, TX has requested $886,000 for a 36-hole disc golf course.

If you have never played disc golf, you might not be aware that this sport has more drug use surrounding it than Major League Baseball and Lindsay Lohan combined.

The joke is that all you need to play is a frisbee and some weed.

Disc GolfWeed

So, basically, the city of Austin, probably the most liberal city in Texas, is petitioning the Federal Government for a really nice place to use a bong.

Besides, isn't the use of a depressant the opposite of stimulus?

Even though these cities may not receive all they are asking for, why would we spend money on frivolous projects like these when we are in a very serious economic situation?

There is no money left in the banks or on Wall Street, so let's fix that with some water parks and a $900,000 drug haven.

THAT's change we can believe in.


  1. Not sure where you get your information, but disc (aka frisbee) golf is a growing health and fitness sports played by families and people from 8 to 88. It's not only great exercise, it's inexpensive, challenging, and lots of fun. It is true that most U.S. courses are free to play in public parks, which might result in some folks drinking or smoking, but for the most part, disc golfers, much like their ball golf cousins, are out to break par.

  2. I understand as I play disc golf probably 5 times a week. I love it, but every course I've ever been to has had a fairly high rate of pot-smoking taking place. I even saw a few guys with a crack pipe last time I was out.

    It was more a commentary on the frivolous and non-stimulative nature of the cities' financial requests of the federal government.

    But if I ever do break par, I'll be sure to let you all know! :)