Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Somali Pirates Seize American Ship; Americans Onboard Return the Favor

This morning Somali pirates took over the Maersk Alabama, a ship flying the American flag with an all American crew of 20. As the Obama administration weighed which approach they would take in response to the Somali pirates, the crew overcame the pirates and reclaimed control of the ship!

This probably came as a shock to the pirates who usually collect a large ransom whenever they take over a European ship, but they made the mistake of taking one that was filled with Americans this time!

The message to the Somali pirates is clear: When you hijack a European ship you get money; when you hijack an American ship your butt kicked overboard.

Here is my dramatic reenactment of the conversation that took place before the crew sprang into action.

"Okay pirates have taken the ship. What are we going to do?"

"Wait for the government to rescue us."

"But we have a Democratic President now."


"The last time a Democratic President tried to rescue American hostages most of the rescuers died and the hostages weren't released until a Republican became president 444 days later. I'm not waiting until 2012 to get home."

"That's a good point. What do you suggest?"

"Obama will probably apologize to the pirates and want to see their side of the hijacking. That's not acceptable to me. I say we go all flight 93 on these thugs because we're alone out here. Let's roll!."

5 minutes later one pirate was captured and the others were thrown overboard.


  1. This WAS the Maersk ALABAMA, was it not? Well, there ya go! I don't know if any of that crew was actually FROM Alabama but with the name ALABAMA on it, hey; they KNEW they were going to stand and fight. I'm sitting here in Alabama and we just stand up and fight for what's right here. Most people here are ready to go get Barack and throw him out of the Whitehouse (it isn't legal...therefore, we're debating this move). Those Somali Pirates won't be boarding any ships with that name any time soon....