Saturday, July 4, 2009

"Not Meddling" In Iran Apparantly Includes "No Sanctions"

Obama has taken his "no meddling" approach to the Iranian situation to a whole new level. Haaretz reports that Obama will oppose sanctions against Iran at the G8 meeting next week.

And why not? It's like everything else. Take what you would do in a situation, choose exactly the opposite, and that's likely where Obama will end up.

See our country running out of money faster than we can print it? Spend more!

Half a million more Americans lose their jobs in June? Claim things are looking up!

Watch Iranians die in the streets of Tehran? Do and say nothing for days!

Witness the violent dismantling of a peaceful uprising for the cause of freedom? Protect the brutal regime responsible for killing its own people!

In the morning, read the paper. Look at the world's problems and ask yourself, "What would I do?" Then think, "What is exactly the opposite of that?" and you will likely end up on the side of Obama.

I'm convinced that's how cabinet meetings go in the White House.

Obama: "What's happening in the world today?"
Cabinet member: "Blah blah blah economy blah blah blah Bush's fault blah blah blah war blah blah blah."
Obama: "What would a sane person do about that?"
Cabinet member:
Obama: "What's precisely the opposite of that idea?"
Cabinet member:
Obama: "Good let's go with that."

Then he makes Robert Gibbs try to explain it to the press. Gibbs, who already has trouble putting more than 3 words together that aren't a quote from Dr. Seuss, understandably has trouble with the President's stated plans.

The willing media feigns joy at idea as they scramble to find rational reasons for why the White House refuses to act in any sane fashion.

In the case of Iran, I assume Obama is planning to use his winning charm and dashing smile to win over the tyrannical leaders of Iran. When that doesn't work he'll show them the photo with his shirt off revealing his carefully photoshopped sculpted abs. When that doesn't work he'll suddenly "get tough" on Iran and tell them that they are not allowed to his birthday party this year.

By that time the Iranians will be laughing so uncontrollably they accidentally send missiles into Israel. Obama will take the position that it's Israel's fault and that it's understandable how the Iranians could have taken such action. Feeling slightly guilty, President Obama will ship replacement missiles to Iran and invoke sanctions against Israel.

Or something along those lines.

No comments:

Post a Comment